Month: June 2012

Last week I decided to tackle a 1,000 piece puzzle. Over the course of several days I chipped away at it – mostly late at night long after the wife and kids had gone to bed. Finally, late one night I could finally see the end in sight. I was tired, but I was NOT going to bed until it was done. If you’ve ever done a puzzle, you know the maddening, addictive feeling you get that overwhelms your tiredness. I got down to about 10 pieces left, and sure enough, one by one they fell into place. There was only one problem. Or, should I say, one piece missing. I got down on my hands and knees, scouring the floor, moving the couches, feeling under all the cushions. Nada. Frustrated, I finally had to conclude that it must have been swept up or that one of our dogs had eaten it, and I went to bed. However, the next day I found myself still clinging to the hope that I might just find it, because, when it comes to puzzles, 999 just isn’t the same as 1,000. One piece really DOES make a difference. Then, about 2 days later, as I was sitting watching a basketball game I noticed something. Perhaps it was just the angle I was sitting at, but something caught my eye. Could it be? Could it really be? And, sure enough, there it was. Right where I had looked a dozen times, there was that one piece. When I put it in it’s place, it made all the difference in the world.

This just in from the category “You can’t make this stuff up”: 

On Wednesday night I went out and enjoyed a great 4-mile run. Afterward I decided to go sit in the sauna in our clubhouse locker room. With nothing but a bottle of water, I headed over. Drenched with sweat I emerged around 10pm only to discovered that I had been locked in by the night patrol. And there was no interior latch by which I could unlock the door.

Now, you must understand, I am a night owl. I often run at night. We live in a retirement community. Everyone goes into their homes for the night before 8pm. I knew it was useless, but I began pounding on the door. The only window in the place – a blurred out window in the bathroom – had no possibility of being opened, so I began to flick the lights rapidly and randomly, hoping someone might observe this strange sight and come to inquire, but who was I kidding; they were all out for the count by then. 

After 30 minutes of failed signal attempts, and not finding anything whatsoever in the way of useless tools, I finally decided that the sauna rocks (which were still quite warm, by the way) were the only thing I might be able to use. So, I pulled one full-sized one and one that was chipped in half, and began looking for how I might use them while they cooled a bit. I really didn’t want to break the window and have to pay for replacement. I finally decided that my only hope was to try and get the pins out of the door hinges. It took some ingenuity, but after about 10 minutes I got them all out. I called the security office to let them know of my harrowing escape and asked them to send the patrolman out to put the hinges back in. Fortunately, it was me who got stuck in there and not one of the elderly folks in our community. Another funny story that will no doubtedly be a great illustration in some talk at some point.